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Monday, March 12, 2007

Hitching a lift

I am still bemused by a discussion I had over the weekend with BBC Welsh affairs editor, Vaughan Roderick.

On Good Morning Wales on Friday he was previewing the Welsh Liberal Democrat Conference and referred to predictions I had made on this blog as to the outcome of the forthcoming elections. With characteristic, but misplaced generosity, Vaughan praised my knowledge of proportional representation systems, describing me as 'having a brain the size of a planet' on such matters. Unfortunately, I misheard him and thought he said that I had 'a brain the size of Thanet'.

It was only in conversation with Vaughan on Saturday that I finally cleared the matter up. I am still not clear however at how I should feel at being compared to Marvin the paranoid android.
Take two aspirins with a drink of ancient coke and while you curl off into hyperspace, think on dude! Alternatively, kick your shoes on and go for a long walk in the Gower and in the words of "Total Recall" ... "empty your mind, empty your mind". Which for you should take all of two 2 femtoseconds. OK, I am being mean, make that two picoseconds ... OK, I will be generous, a millisecond, which to be fair is a million times 1 nanosecond. Do you remember "power numbers" or "powers to the minus ten" from school? Negative log to the base of 10 hydrogen ion concentration, which at 10 to the minus 7 is neutral pH (pH 7). Many school kids know about pH, but few understand it, but nearly all are willing to bet that global warming is to blame for earthquakes, tsunamis, and warm icecream.
Sorry, I lost concentration for maybe a couple of picoseconds ... that should have read ... 10 to the minus 7 molar H+ ion concentration. Where's my brain gone? Need a pint of Brain's SA. (I actually went through college thinking Brain's SA was in fact "Brains Assay". Then again I went through my PhD thinking Celtic and Rangers was one team. No one corrected me when I often said (during three years plus in bonnie Glasgow), "I want to see a Celtic Rangers game". I only sussed that they were in fact two teams when I read that Rangers fans booed off a Catholic player who "could play for Celtic, but not Rangers". It was so weird living in another version of Belfast. Still, pH read the same in the lab, and the laws of physics were much muchness and a bridie was a pastie and "that's you" means "your done" and Scottish money had pound notes ... and very few were dumb enough to think global warming caused tsunamis. When I read that school kids thought that, I really wondered at the competence of their teachers. Every knows tsunamis are cones topped off with tidal waves of ice cream and tasty caramel. In the UsofA, just remember to call a rubber an erasure, a bonnet a hood, a boot a trunk, gas is petrol, a lift is an elevator and “slip road” has no meaning (it’s a ramp), and “yard” is “garden”, a car with a stick is car with a manual gear shift, “knock yourself out” means the opposite, and global warming is responsible for tsunamis and the rats, but almost a minority now, at the Welsh Assembly.
DR. Christopher, who are you and why do you torture us with your banality?
Anonymous > feel free to identify yourself, and I will respond - can you manage that?
One has touched upon ones raw nerves. So Doctor, who is one to confound us so much?
I'm glad it's not just me then.

I was totally bemused by Dr Chris' post.
Leave Chris Wood alone. His comments on this blog at least stop him writing some rather odd letters to the South Wales Echo. I think he's still in shock because of the way in which the yanks have turned against Bush over Iraq
If Vaughan Roderick does "Welsh affairs" what do the rest of BBC Wales do? English affairs?
What do you mean anonymous? Chris still writes the "odd" letter to the Echo now and then!!
Well guys, debate something y don't ya. Challenge some premise cherished by the Lib Dems. There's plenty to challenge. The Lib Dem manifesto seems strangely shallow, strong on words, lacking in detail, and based on false premises.
... and so do you Mike!
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